Fan-987-Logosm 35h_cbssportsrad_tampa cw44_tb

Tale of the tape

New England Patriots Vs. The Dark Knight Rises

Over the past several years, Christopher Nolan’s seminal Batman movies have not only been examples of great superhero movies, but arguably great cinema as well. It’s no wonder, then, that 2012’s The Dark Knight Rises was met with extraordinary expectations. Similarly, the 2013 Patriots entered the season highly regarded – as they do every year that both T-Brads and Bill Belichick are on staff. So which of these highly anticipated juggernauts delivered?

patriotstale1.jpg tdkrtale3.jpg

New England Patriots

The Dark Knight Rises

“YEAHHHH!”* (*BUT only for Patriots fans) Initial Excitement? “WOOOOO!”
"Why...are we struggling against the Bills and the Jets?" Vague Sense of Worry? "Why...is Bruce Wayne hobbling around a broken down apartment?"
Handsome-yet-ruffled protagonist, still arguably in his prime, yet possessing some silly, silly hair. Whines kind of a lot. Leading man? Handsome-yet-beaten down protagonist, well past his prime, but still hoping to make a difference.
Man...Rob Gronkowski sure does spend a lot of his life injured. Growing Sense of Worry? Man...Bruce Wayne sure does spend a lot of this movie injured.
No, which stinks, because even retired, he’d be their 2nd best receiver - maybe their best receiver - in 2013. Features Hines Ward? With gusto!
Something, something, Aaron Hernandez, something. Unsettling Level of Violence? That time that everyone in the stadium died...except Hines Ward.
Bernard Pollard. Secret Supervillain That silly-voiced fella who gets taken down by Anne Hathaway.
[Emperor Palpatine] Bill Belichick. Wise Mentor? Michael Caine!
Cutting Wes Welker! Most Illogical Move? Announcing comeback by burning a gasoline bat into the Brooklyn Bridge. That probably took way more time than it needed to, Bats.
It’s looking that way, but the season is still early. Secretly Lousy? Yeah.

The winner is

tdkrtale3.jpg
The Dark Knight Rises
6 out of 10

With a score of 6 out of 10, The Dark Knight Rises takes it! But don’t put too much stock into this. Both are probably overrated.
-Brian Cullen, CBS Local Sports contributor

More Tales of the tape

  1. (Photo Credit: Getty Images/Richard Heathcote) (Photo Credit: Getty Images/Warren Little)
    Tale Of The Tape: Winter Olympics In Sochi Vs. FIFA World Cup In Brazil

    With both sites having their share of issues in hosting major international sporting events, we went to the tape to decide who was the worst host of 2014.

  2. Cleveland Cavaliers v Atlanta Hawks LeBron James (Photo Credit: Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images)
    Tale Of The Tape: LeBron James Decision 1 Vs. Decision 2

    Let’s compare LeBron James’ first decision to leave the Cavs to his decision to opt out with the Heat.

  3. San Antonio Spurs (Credit: Chris Covatta/Getty Images) Los Angeles Lakers (Credit: Nathaniel S Butler/NBAE via Getty Images)
    Tale Of The Tape: Spurs Dynasty Vs Lakers Dynasty

    The Spurs won their fifth title in the last 15 years, but is the Lakers dynasty better?

See all Tales of the Tape